When You Love Someone But He/She Goes Away...

Judulnya kepanjangan, Sis... Sengaja, efek lelah sama laporan *curcol*

"Sis, ga ngeblog lagi?" Gue lelah dengan pertanyaan ini. Masih kok, cuma jarang ada waktu plus gue sering kena writer block. Akhir-akhir ini gue lebih akrab sama laporan kimor, sampe blog jadi ga terurus.

Yap, sekarang gue balik lagi dengan sebuah cerpen yang udah lama banget gue tulis. Masih layak baca atau tidak, terserah gimana lo nanggepinnya aja. Enjoy....

Tak Apa

Ku lihat senyum manis tiada tara di muka bumi yang cetar membahana ini. Senyummu, siapa lagi. Sosok malaikat tanpa sayap yang jatuh dari pohon mangga Pak Sukirman. Hahaha iyaa, masa jatuh dari surga, ntar dikira Cjr lagi.

Berulang kali ku dengar semua kata cintamu yang selalu mengalun lembut ditelingaku. Masih dengan nada yang sama. Dengan sentuhan yang sama. Masih bisa ku lihat jelas senyum yang terukir indah itu di wajahmu yang simetris. Masih. Masih sampai saat ini meski tak lagi dapat kurasa hangat pelukmu.

Ingatkah kau akan semua janjimu ketika kita duduk di atas bukit sembari menikmati secangkir kopi yang "katamu" kau curi dari gelas kakek. Duh, lucu ya waktu mengingat kekonyolanmu saat itu.

Well balik lagi. "Ndut, ntar kalo aku udah jad pelaut kaya Popaye, terus kalo udah nyampe di Inggris aku bakalan beliin kam magic wand kayak harry potter. mau?"

"Ndat ndut. dasar Gembuk!" ku cubit lembut lenganmu yang menurtmu berotot itu. "Iyaa boleeh dehh... Beliin yang banyak biar bisa di juali disini" godaku.

"Duh, punya pacar otak dagang" kau malah menoyor kepalaku.

Hey, aku masih ingat itu yaa...

***

Juni, 2012

"Maaf tante baru bisa kasi tau kamu sekarang sayang.." itu kata mamamu. Tiba-tiba saja dia mengabariku tentang kepergianmu. DASAR GEMBUUUK!!!

Tak mengapa jika kau pergi sebentar saja. Pergi mengarungi samudra, bukan lagi telaga seperti yang biasa kita lakukan dulu. DASAR ANEH! kenapa masih kau paksa juga ke Inggris dikala cuaca sejelek itu? Kenapa? Apa karena tongkat sihir itu? Ya Tuhaaan GEMBUUK!!! kau tinggalkan aku untuk selamanya??? Jahat! Tega!!

Seharusnya kau bentang layar perahumu dan berlayarlah di samudra hatiku. Aku tak lagi punya telaga karena kita mengarungi hidup bersama. Telaga cinta tak lagi cukup untukmu. Pergilah berlayar di sana. tempatkan perahumu yang gagah itu. Maaf bukan perahu, apakah itu bahtera kita? Bahtera laksana rumah tangga yang akan kau bangun bersamaku? indah. kau tinggalkan dia disana.

Tak apa Mbuk, biar ku jaga bahtera itu. Untuk kehidupan kita di dimensi yang lain. Gembuk, berlayarlah di hatiku, ku tuggu kau di dimensi yang lain. I LOVE YOU MBUUK.

2. Tema kedua : "Akulah si Telaga" - Sapardi Djoko Damono :

Akulah si Telaga

 Sapardi Djoko Damono

Akulah si telaga:

berlayarlah di atasnya;

berlayarlah menyibakkan riak-riak kecil yang menggerakkan bunga-bunga padma;

berlayarlah sambil memandang harumnya cahaya;

sesampai di seberang sana,

tinggalkan begitu saja perahumu

Biar aku yang menjaganya

Perahu Kertas

Kumpulan Sajak

1982

I LOVE THE WAY YOU LIE #FF2in1 #1

"Hun, besok kamu ada acara ga?" tanayku pada sebuah pertemuan makan siang bersama Jack, kekasihku.

"Tidak, ada apa Bun?" tanyanya lembut sembari memegang tanganku erat.

"Besok malam kita dinner di cafe biasa bisa?" tanayku dengan bersemangat.

"Hmm... Lihat gimana nanti ya Bun. Takutnya besok malah ga bisa" kata Jack tanpa melihatku. Ada sesuatu yang disembunyikannya, pasti. Aku yakin itu.

"Well gapapa kok Hun, ntar jadi ga jadi kabarin aku yah"

***

Aku berdiri dan menunggu Jack di depan sebuah cafe tempat kami biasa bertemu. Aku masih belum ingin masuk sampai aku tahu kabar dari Jack.

Lima belas menit berlalu sia-sia tanpa satu kabar pun darinya. ku ptuskan untuk menelepon.

"Jack, are you ok? Gimana bisa? Aku udah di depan cafe nih" tanyaku lembut

"Um.. Uhuk, Ginny maaf sepertinya aku tidak bisa. Aku sedang tidak enak badan. Sorry yah Bun. Kamu ga marah kan?"

"Oh ya? Ok gapap gws ya Hun. Love yaa" pembicaraan kami pun terputus. Singkat. 

Tak lama Dinda mengirimiku pesan untuk menghadiri anniv ke 3 bulannya bersama Rick. Well, keren menurutku.

Semua berjalan baik-baik saja awalnya sampai ku lihat seseorang yang sangat aku kenal baik duduk dengan indahnya dan bermesraan dengan seorang wanita yang ku kenal baik. Tebak! Itu Jack, dan Dinda. Entahlah aku tak tau bagaimana aku bisa menahan semua rasa yang rebutan ingin keluar ini. Kenapa Dinda harus berbohong padaku jika dia pacarnya "Rick" itu adalah "jack" ? kenapa Jack tak pernah jujur padaku? 

but thats ok, aku senang melihatnya bahagia. mereka. yah mereka bahagia. dan aku? terbakar dengan semua perasaan yang menyedihkan ini.

HOW CAN I MEET ONE DIRECTION?

“Aaah.. Can’t wait to meet ONE DIRECTION!” Leelah said.

“What the hell are you doing, huh? Can’t you stop screaming out loud? You bother me!”

“What the hell am I doing? Oh common Amber, I’m a directioner. That was a common thing, ok?”

“I hate one direction. Why you always scream after you watch them? What the hell did they do to you? Hypnotism?”

“No, you must be a directioner, so you can understand”

“Oh no thank you”

<3

      That was a stupid thing that Leeelah ever told to me. I never thought to be a directioner, NEVER. So, I would online and chatting with mah friends on mah facebook.

“Hi Amber!”

“Hello Rose, wassup?”

“I invited you to join a fans page J”

“Really? Oh thanks, but what kind of fans page that you meant?”

“One Direction. Almost all of girls in this world got a danger disease is called ONE DIRECTION INFECTION!”

“Not interest”

“Watev”

      Why almost all of mah friends were talking about one direction? I couldn’t let it go. I had to check it. “Who are you one direction? Are you a wizard or something? Tell me”. So I opened the goolge and typed “who is one direction?” and a few seconds then I got everything about one direction, such as the members’ name, their songs, their album, etc.

      It wasn’t enough for me to prove that one direction infection was a danger disease. Then I searched them on youtube. And do you know what happen then?

It wasn’t about one direction again, but it was about me. I needed oxygen, someone pleased gave me more oxygen. No, they weren’t a wizards. They just ordinary boys from England and Ireland. But no, it wasn’t enough.

      They were so brilliant, extraordinary, amazing, fabulous, and phenomenal. I couldn’t describe them anymore. They already stolen my heart. Oh no! please dont tell me that I become a directioner! But I couldn’t hide it, even I had tried.

<3

      That’s was my commitment to be a new directioner.

“Leelah.. Vas happenin?”

“Wait a minute! Did you say …”

“Yes, you are right, I know it is weird but I also love them. So, would you like to say hello to the new directioner like me?”

“Yeah of course. But how…?”

“I can’t tell you, sorry. That is my privacy ;)”

<3

      One day, I dreamed about one direction. Harry came to my dream and it was wonderful. He danced with me and made me laugh. We had a dinner together and he told me that he loved me. And I hoped it would come true. But how can I meet one direction? I was just an ordinary girl in a small town. My dream was too high.

      But Leelah said it didn’t matter. Till I talked with someone named Toby. I online in omegel. Yeah it wasn’t good web for underage girl like me but I just wanna had new friends all over the world. So, the story about a boy named Toby was started There.

      I found a boy with a mask and I also used a mask to hide my face.

“Hi… asl”

“Hello.. 15, female, ----, you?”

“LOL 18, male, England”

“cool”

“so truth or dare?”

“truth”

“what are you doing in this web?”

“finding new friends”

“that’s weird”

“I know. So wbu?”

“Idk”

“LOL you are also weird. Btw, I like your mask”

“thanks, I like your mask too”

“Oh thanks, so what else?”

“I think this isn’t great media to talk with you. This is my email add countonme@gmail.com”

“you want me to send you an email?”

“umm no, may I get your email add too?”

“yeah blabla_boom@gmail.com”

“do you mind if I send you an email?”

“No”

“so, you can check your inbox now”

“you already sent me an email?”

“Just check it out”

Then, he disconnected me. I closed the omegel and opened my gmail account. And yeah, I had an inbox from ah idk the name.

“Hi mask girl, this is me, the mask boy”

“Hello the mask boy. Name please?”

“Toby, yeah call me Toby. You”

“Um”

“Sorry?”

“Yeah just call me Um”

“LOL so, sorry for disconnected”

“Nvm J”

“Thanks, I thought that I hurt you”

“no you didn’t”

“So I think we must hang out to pay it”

“we? Hang out? Pay what?”

“Yeah. We can go for dinner or watev you want. To pay my mistake of course”

“I am so far away. Sorry we can’t”

The story about Toby didn’t end. We still sent email each other. Just for said hi.

<3

The holiday came. My uncle took me with his family to go to London. I was so excited. So I emailed Toby.

“OMG! Are you sure? What are you doing here?”

“here? You live in London?”

“uh-huh. Where are you now?”

“I’m in front of the books store. I’m looking for one direction!”

“you? Directioner?”

“yeah, why?”

“ok wait up, don’t go anywhere im gonna pick you up. Use your mask so I can know you”

“ok, I’m waiting. Hurry up please”

I forgot, how could he pick me up? There were so many books store in London. But then..

“Hey Um, the books store location is beside the hotel right?”

“yeah”

“so please use your mask. I am in red Volvo”

“ok… I’m out”

Then I saw a Volvo was parked in front of the book store.

“Toby?”

“Yes, come in”

“Same mask. So, why you pick me up? Actually I just wanna buy some books there. I don’t really want to meet One Direction, because  I know that they are so busy”

“Who says?”

“Just guess”

“Ok just close your mouth and I’ll drive to my home”

London was so beautiful. The views were so amazing.

“yup, we’ve arrived”

“is this your home? Big home”

“No. I live with my brother, Luke. Yeah, Luke. Come in”

He opened the door. It was a great and clean. I sat on the big sofa. I saw three boys were watching TV but they used masks too. And someone there, I thought that he was Luke, and he also used mask.

“why does everybody use mask?”

“are you directioner?”

“Yes, but please answer my question”

“because we have something to tell you. Would you like to open your mask?”

“ok” then I opened my mask. I didn’t care how did I look? I just sat and stalked.

“its time for me to open my mask”

“ok”

You would never ever believe that was Toby. Never. Toby was my friend, but then Toby changed to be Harry Styles. I just shocked and speechless. OHMAHGOD! “Somebody please kill me now”. Then one of the boys said “No, harry has told everything about you to us. He said that you were so beautiful”

“but how? He never seen my face”

“I don’t need to see your face, Um. I know you are so beautiful coz you stole my heart”

“but how? And who are they?”

“guys…”

All of them opened their masks. “Somebody wake me up or I’m gonna die”

“NOOO!!” They said it together.

“TOBY.. I mean Harry you just already lied me! You didn’t tell me the truth. You didn’t tell me that you…”

“no of course, I’ll never forgive ma self if it happen. I just like the way you are. And may be after I told you who I am you will change. You won’t be my friend anymore. So that’s why I keep it”

“I hate you. Ok I’m a stylator but I hate a liar!” I opened harry’s door and said “my name is Amber and I am not a liar”

Louis held me hard. “You must stay here for a moment and listen to harry”. Oh God, I felt melting after heard Louis’s voice. “Sorry Lou”

“Harry has thought of you all the time. Even he has made a plan to meet you and come to your home” zayn said.

“he needs hotdog, sorry I mean you!” niall said.

“please stay and let he tell you something” liam said so softly.

“Ok. I just..”

“We know..” they said together.

“Ok Amber. I  know it is hard to tell you but I can’t hold it anymore. You look so beautiful with mask and more beautiful without it. Have you ever heard this song ‘I wanna be your live your voice your reason to be my love my heart’. From the deep of my heart, I wanna say would you like to be my girl?”

He held my hands and looked at me in the eyes. I was nervous, I never thought about it before. But who cared? I love harry or Toby so much. He was so good and friendly. And he loved me. I didn’t care what will happen then. Paparazzi or anything. I just wanna spend my holiday and my live with Harry.

“yes, I’d love to” I smiled and harry hug me. It was not only a big hug but also he kissed me. He was a great kisser I had ever met. The boys were happy with that. But me, I swore that was a best holiday ever. I could meet one direction and then Toby was being my boyfriend. It was amazing, wasn’t it?

Aya dan Malaikat Aya

Pagi itu, Aya terlihat kurang ceria. Entah apa yang ada difikirannya. “Kamu kenapa sih?” tanya Lia. “Enggak apa-apa, ke kantin yuk!” Lia mencoba menebak apa yang sedang terjadi pada temannya itu. “Oh, pasti gara-gara malaikatmu yang ada di kelas tiga itu kan?” tanya Lia setelah berfikir lama. Aya hanya tersenyum.

      Tidak lama kemudian, sosok malaikat yang mereka bicarakan pun muncul. Sosok manusia yang penuh kharisma, terlihat sangat bijaksana, dan cuek yang selama ini diidolakan Aya. Biasanya, saat Aya melihat malaikat itu, dengan reflek ia akan menjerit dan melompat, seakan-akan malaikat itu menebarkan pesona yang membuat Aya tak sanggup menahan rasa kagumnya yang berlebihan. Tapi, tidak untuk kali ini. Aya hanya diam dan membisu.

      “Tumben enggak mencak-mencak?” goda Lia. “Males ah, dia juga enggak pernah mencak-mencak kalo melihat aku” jawab Aya dengan ketus. “Heh? Secara juga dia enggak kenal sama kamu!”

    “Bukan itu masalahnya. Aku ini sedang galau. Baru dapat info yang enggak bagus mengenai kakak itu.” Mendengar hal itu, Lia pun terkejut dan menarik tangan Aya untuk duduk di depan labor computer.

    “Lho? Aku mau jajan nih. Gimana sih?” tanya Aya yang bingung dengan sikap Lia. “Iya, nanti saja. Info apa?” tanya Lia yang antusias dengan pernyataan Aya. 
         “Aku dapat info dari seseorang yang  namanya enggak perlu disebutkan. Katanya si malaikat itu naksir sama Renne, itu lho anak kelas sebelah” cerita Aya dengan ekspresi yang datar. “Apa? Bukannya Renne sudah punya pacar?” tanya Lia. “Iya. Setahu aku, Renne itu enggak suka sama malaikat. Karena hal itulah malaikatku mundur. Maksudnya enggak jadi naksir Renne lagi. Tapi, tetap saja hatiku ini terasa bagai dijatuhkan bom seperti di Hiroshima dan Nagasaki.  Sakit banget. Apalagi Renne itu jauh lebih baik daripada aku.”

            “Ye… beda kali Aya, lebih baik dari mananya? Kamu sama Renne itu tidak jauh berbeda kok.” Lia mencoba menghibur Aya. Aya hanya tersenyum sambil menarik tangan Lia ke kantin.

            Rasa kagum Aya kepada seseorang yang dianggapnya sebagai malaikat itu membuatnya sangat bersyukur atas nikmat Tuhan yang tak pernah putus-putusnya. Ia selalu menantikan malaikat pujaan hatinya lewat di hall dan berharap malaikat pujuaan hatinya itu mampir dalam mimpi indahnya. Ia berharap bayang-bayang malaikat itu selalu menyelimuti kehidupannya yang pelan-pelan berubah menjadi indah. Ia tak sabar menulis lembar demi lembar kertas putih tentang perjalanan cintanya dengan tinta emas agar terkesan begitu berharga. Seakan-akan malaikat itu sendiri seperti separuh dari jiwanya yang ia jaga.

            Beberapa hari setelah itu…

            Aya menghampiri Lia dan menceritakan semua informasi yang baru ia dapatkan mengenai malaikat pujaan hatinya itu. “Apa? Jadi kakak itu sedang dalam masa pendekatan sama Nay?” Lia terkejut dan rasa  tidak percayanya mendesaknya untuk mengutarakan banyak pertanyaan yang sulit di jawab oleh Aya. “Yah, itulah yang sejauh ini aku ketahui. Dia itu adalah malaikat yang membuat aku memohon kepada Tuhan agar ia bisa membuatku tersenyum. Tapi ini malah sebaliknya” keluh Aya.

            “Kamu tahu darimana?” tanya Aya. “Twitter, Facebook, please deh Lia sekarang itu bukan zamannya lagi untuk mengemis informasi. Mulanya dia hanya kirim salam, lalu minta nomor handphone, terus sms-an, dan berlanjut sampai sekarang.”

            “Belum tentu juga mereka pacaran kan, Aya” sanggah Lia. “Lia,  intinya itu begini, aku sama sekali bukan tipe cewek yang mudah putus asa. Ibuku pernah bilang bahwa seuatu yang tidak mungkin itu punya kemungkinan untuk terjadi. Dan Mario Teguh pernah mengatakan bahwa cinta yang mulia itu adalah mencintai orang yang sulit untuk dicintai, dan cinta itu harus memiliki. Pernyataan itu akan berubah jika orang kita cintai sudah memiliki orang lain, atau menginginkan orang lain selain kita atau juga orang yang mencintai itu sudah dimiliki orang lain. Dan dalam hal ini, aku tidak putus asa, hanya saja menyerahkan diri pada apa yang sudah ditakdirkan Tuhan. Toh, aku hanya seorang penggemar, tidak lebih. Aku juga akan bahagia jika aku masih bisa melihat malaikat berjalan dengan sinarnya yang memancar keseluruh penjuru hatiku di hall setiap hari.”

            Mendengar penjelasan dari Aya, Lia pun tersenyum dan  berkata, “kalau begitu mari kita menelan bola lampu supaya kita juga bersinar seperti malaikatmu. Haha” Aya tersenyum mendengar gurauan Lia. Dan pada akhirnya bell masuk pun berbunyi. Mereka masuk kedalam kelas sambil bergurau ria.

short story!

“We never know if we never try” was a good sentence. But Lily didn’t think so. She always tried everything to get experience, but not for love. She was a student of senior high school and focus with her study. Lily had some close friends named Via, Mimi, and Hastie. Her friends always told her about their boyfriend and asked her when she would got a boyfriend. But Lily always calm down.

The sun was shining today and Lily ran to the physics class. “Open your book page 11 and do the exercise” Ms. Adel said. Lily looked so focus to do her duty and nobody disturbed her. The bells rang while Ms. Adel was talking. It meant time was over. Lily walked out the class and Mimi stopped her.

 “Why did you late?” Mimi asked. “I lost my book, so I had to find it”. “Hey, let’s go to the canteen. I’m hungry” Hastie said. they walked slowly to the canteen, suddenly Via called Lily. “Lily…! Wait for me. I have some great story for you. Do you want to hear that?” Via said. “Oh, ok. I’d love to. Sorry Hastie, I can’t accompany you to the canteen”.

Via and Lily sat in front of the multimedia room. “What’s up?” Lily asked. “It is all about my novel. I have a great idea. I will write a love story about you”. “What? Me? What will you write? I haven’t boyfriend and nobody want to be my boyfriend”.

“Just calm down. Imagination. Remember?” Via tried to explain. Lily watched out her clock and said “I have to go. Talent class now. I have to meet Jessica and go to chemistry class. See you”. Lily ran to chemistry class.

“Hi Lily!” Jessica said. “Hi Jess. Do I late?” Lily asked. “No. There is two students only in this class”. Lily looked around and laughed. “Ok. Let’s wait for other and read a book”. Their seniors came in. but jess and Lily didn’t know, they was so focus. Mrs. Ann explained about mol. “I fell so happy today, but I don’t know why” Lily said after finished the duty on the whiteboard. “Oh yeah? May be because this is the first time for us to join this class”. Then its time for Jess to do the duty on the whiteboard.

Lily looked at the window and found a boy sat behind the window. He looked so cool and smart. He wore glasses and Lily liked him. “Hey, are you ok?” Jess asked. Lily just smile. “Who is his name?” Lily asked. “ Adam. He is our senior. Eleven Science Bilingual class”. “Oh. We have a fifteen minutes more for English day”.

After chemistry class, Lily went to hall to join the English day with other student. “Do you believe love in the first sight?” Lily asked. “Yeah. Why not? Everything is possible in this world” Hastie answered. “Oh, great”. “What’s wrong with her?” Hastie whispered to Jess. “Fall in love with our senior”. Hastie just smile and talked to Via and Mimi.

One day after school. “Hastie, I don’t know how to do it? It is so difficult. Can you help me?” Lily asked. “No. Chemistry. I’m a journalist. May be you can ask it  to my cousin, Adam. Our senior”. “What? Adam? Oh my gosh. How can?”. “Yeah, just say hi then ask him about it”.

“where is he?” Lily asked. “he is in corridor. Reading the announcement.” Hastie said. lily felt so shy, confused, and nervous. “Ok. Wish me luck”. Lily went to met Adam and share about her problem and Adam helped her. He was friendly. It made Lily more loved him. They was shaking hands when Hastie came to Lily. “thanks Adam” Lily said. “Your Welcome” Adam said and smile.

“how do you feel?” hastie asked after adam went to leave them. “Great! Thanks hastie”.  They laughed.